THE COMPLAINER

hmupdated 31 august 1995
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letter S letter A letter I letter L number 9 number 5 (in flags!)

SAIL'95: sucking the buck.

Impressions of Amsterdam's Sail95

Grand Entrance and Boulevard parade
The impressive Batavia surrounded by view blocking pleasure yachts basking in its glory..... The Amsterdam dito.....
Brown-leather and Heineken boatpeople showing off their fried skins ..... partying, admired only by themselves..... women sipping their white wines..... skippers gulping their beer.....
A hot, bored mob on a forced march along the official one-way route..... Beautiful boats with ugly handwritten signs.....

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"NO PUBLIC"     "FOR GUESTS ONLY"
"INVITED   GUESTS   ENTRANCE"

"COLD DRINK$: Hfl 2,50"              
                      "TOILET$: Hfl 1,00"

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Not a single water-fountain to be found (no profit in it)..... The postbank gave out useless and resource-waisting 3-power throwaway binoculars.
For a better appriciated publicity stunt, sponsor some free water-fountains next time!.....

Location
Most of it felt like a construction site..... parts of the "boulevard" were normally in use as an "afwerkplaats" (a legal spot where illegal substance addicted prostitutes assist their customers in ejaculating).....they were told to do their jobs for this event somewhere else illegally.....
What an ugly site.....I suggest next time inviting Christo to wrap up the entire harbour before the Parade boats arrive.....

Canals
Crowded with little boats..... many unfamiliar with Amsterdam.....with map and beer at the stearing wheel.....
Waiting for the pieremaggochel (a decorated boatparade) at canal intersections was fun, like watching bumperboats..... hits, near misses, sidewalls ramming.....
The police was ignored in their attempts controlling the boat mob.....
Even more entertaining than the actual parade itself..... a bore, mainly consisted of overcrowded undecorated boats:..... self-indulgent students..... football supporters (the real ones)..... children on ugly, unimaginatively decorated floats.....
The latter soaking the viewing public with their waterpistols..... oh, what a fun..... if only they'd put as much effort into decorating their float!.....
Isn't there any creativity taught at school?.....
Because of this frenzy refilling I even saw a child fall into the canal..... luckily this time wearing a life jacket..... and pulled just in time from under the boat.....
However, some folks did make an effort..... greatly appreciated by the public.....

Pleasantries
Bungy jumpers plunging head first upto their ankles in the river IJ.....
Traditionally smoked fish as entertaintment and profit.....
Besides the few obvious stars of SAIL, my favorite was the sailing "snelbak"..... an acid green floating flatbed truck.....
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